“I don’t want to be this fat.”

“I don’t want to be this fat.”

I hear you, and frankly, I don’t either.

I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror yesterday wearing a shirt that doesn’t fit me well, and I was genuinely disgusted with the way I looked.

Listen, I know I’m that last person who should be admitting stuff like that. But honestly, we live in a culture that tells us we’re gross in millions of different ways, and there are very real drawbacks to living in a larger body -- small chairs, limited clothing choices, blatant shaming and discrimination. It’s NORMAL to feel disappointed in our bodies.

I know your first instinct is to want to “fix” your body, but going down that road is a waste of time. You know it because you’ve tried it already, but it’s also supported by actual research: diets do not work.

There’s nothing you can do about your weight right now. I know...I’m sorry.

But even if there’s nothing you can do about your weight right now, it doesn’t mean you just give up and agree to be miserable forever.

There are things you CAN control.


1. You can improve the way you feel about yourself. 

You can decide to accept yourself the way you are, and look for ways to be ok with it. You can pray, recite affirmations, read books, look at pictures of yourself, find people who look like you on social media, set boundaries with your family about what they’re allowed to say about your body, and list all the things you love about yourself.

2. You can control how comfortable you are in the body you have right now.

You can wear clothes that fit properly, eat foods that make you feel good, move your body in ways that work for you, hire professionals to help you with specific problems, stretch, rest, take hot baths, massage your feet, lift weights to get stronger, take naps, blow dry your hair, and snuggle under fuzzy blankets and relax.


Remember, friend...there’s nothing actually wrong with you. Let go of that old fantasy that one day you’ll be skinny and happy. Give yourself permission to be happy now.


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